He’d spent his career studying the crater. He knew every inch of the basin and could pinpoint the exact time and place of the ancient impact. But he consistently found anomalies in his core samples. There was evidence of plastics and even organic compounds that couldn’t have occurred naturally. Finally, he fronted the expense to time travel to the impact event. He was gratified to discover that the falling asteroid was exactly where he plotted. Unfortunately, he miscalculated the arrival of his craft, placing himself in its path. ‘At least I know where the anomalous elements came from,’ he thought.
She was famous both as a philanthropist and as a witch, although not in the same circles. She’d figured out how to distill and bottle approbation. You needed a lot of the stuff to make an elixir, though. Her schedule filled up with charity drives, advocacy meetings, and good deeds. After being awarded the key to the city, she calculated that it cost her more to be a witch than she made in good will. She retired from witchcraft and dedicated her life to service. But she kept a stash of brewed approval in a back cupboard, just in case.
The newspapers called the affair a ‘dalliance.’ It was a politeness the actor would’ve found funny, if the stories hadn’t endangered his career. The vague details of their salacious escapades with his costar would’ve been nothing more than tawdry gossip, if they hadn’t both been men. The studio worked quickly to quash the rumors, putting the filming on ice. They were both seen with popular starlets hanging from their arms at Hollywood premiers. Slowly the story died away. And he waited until the eyes of the world were off of them, when he would dally with his true love again.
The cake was the most beautiful, perfect baked good I’d ever seen. It rose in tier on tier of perfectly balance order. The white icing sparkled like fresh snow, and the piped rosettes were as red as blood. “Go on,” the baker said, wringing his hands. “Don’t you want to take a slice?” It seemed like a crime to cut into the cake, but I raised the triangular server and brought it down with just a moment’s hesitation. I screamed as I felt the blade slice into my own stomach instead. I heard the demonic baker laugh as woke up.
The thief waited until the dragon flew off before sneaking into the cave. His patience was rewarded with a huge pile of glittering treasure at the back. Working quickly and quietly, he began to fill his pack. A large, glittering ruby caught his eye. The thief grabbed for it, but it slid just out of his grasp. Muttering curses, he tried again, and chased the jewel until he found himself knee deep in the hoard. The coins suddenly shifted, revealing a baleful eye and gaping jaws. The mimic devoured the thief in a single bite, leaving only a boot behind.
The family was well prepared for the hurricane. They had stocked up on food, water, and toilet paper and were comfortable in their sub-basement bunker. They could stay down there for a year. It never hurt to be prepared, even if they’d had to run all over town. They bought out three stores, leaving the parking lot with a trailer full of supplies while everyone else pulled up in a panic. When the hurricane knocked down a huge tree and blocked the exit, it somehow took a month for it to be removed. But at least they were well prepared.
She vowed to give succor to all who needed it, and travelled the paths of the kingdom, fulfilling her vow. But she found that there were more people in need than she could help alone: Too many hungry mouths, too many sick, too many suffering. She called on the leaders of her order, who listened with sympathy but gave her nothing but advice. She appealed to the local authorities, who didn’t listen at all. She prayed and meditated, but no answer came. If the systems would not help her, she decided, then they were the problem. She got to work.
The martial artist trained for years, honing his body and his mind, studying ancient techniques and learning from any master who would teach him. And now he was here: at the world’s most elite martial arts tournament. He was still an unknown, but that would change very soon. He was within moments of achieving his dream of becoming the world’s strongest fighter. He bowed to his opponent, confident that he would be victorious. When his opponent began glowing and knocked him down without ever touching him he realized the truth: He was just an extra in someone else’s fighting anime.
The first rule of his business was never to fraternize. Do not get involved with your target and never make yourself memorable. Do the job. Get in, get what you came for, and get out. Friendships were only complications. That was what it meant to be a world-class thief, and he was the best that you’ve never heard of. But it was cold, living in the dark. He was tired of standing in the shadows and watching light and life pass him by. He was bored of trinkets. He wanted to steal hearts. And hers was just waiting for him.
In the bleary light of rain-soaked dawn, I yawn and trudge into an unfamiliar kitchen. I don’t really remember much of the night before, but I wouldn’t have these holes in my memory if it hadn’t been a good time. What I need now is coffee. The stronger, the better, to really feel alive. I find the machine. It’s a beautiful, high-end gleaming steel monstrosity that takes up most of the counter. But when I open the pantry, it’s filled with row upon row of cans, the word ‘decaffeinated’ printed in bright red letters. Somewhere, I hear a demonic laugh…
Hugh J. O'Donnell 