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Everyday Drabbles #1142: Gift-Wrapped

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“Would you like this gift-wrapped?” The cashier asked.
Even though the book wasn’t a present, he felt just a bit happier with the shiny package tucked under his arm.
More things should be gift-wrapped, he decided.
And he put his plan into action. He wrapped up small things around the house at first. It made everything feel more festive, so he just kept going.
When he wrapped up his wife’s car, she put her foot down.
“You don’t like it?” He asked.
“It’s not that I don’t like it, but it’s April. And I’m late for work,” she replied, exasperated.

Gift Wrapping 13” by origamiguy1971 is licensed under CC BY 2.0.

My very short story collection, The Mountain’s Shadow is available now from Amazon and Smashwords!

Everyday Drabbles © 2024 by Hugh J. O’Donnell is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 4.0 

Waiting for Santa Claus

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The new colony was far from Earth, and after their long journeys, most of the colonists left traditions behind.
But as the colony prepared for its first winter, she reminded her children to be good, or else Santa Claus wouldn’t come.
Some colonists smiled nostalgically as she told her children about flying reindeer and elfin toymakers. Others admonished her for such childish fantasy, but never within the children’s earshot.
She truly believed in the magic of Christmas, and reasoned that every planet has a North Pole.
Even she was surprised when some extra presents appeared under the tree Christmas morning.

snapshotsofthepast.com Santa 1 (97).JPG” by snapshotsofthepast.com is licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0.

My very short story collection, The Mountain’s Shadow is available now from Amazon and Smashwords!

Everyday Drabbles © 2024 by Hugh J. O’Donnell is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 4.0 

Podcast Repost – CCRC84: Mr. Magoo’s Christmas Carol

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Tonight your hosts, Hugh of HughJODonnell.com, Rich the Time Traveller, Opop, and Jurd, travel back to take in the very first animated Christmas special.

Chrononaut Cinema Reviews is presented by https://www.skinner.fm and http://hughjodonnell.com, and is released under the Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial 3.0 Unported License.

The Freelance Hunters: The Unknown Package, Part 5 of 5

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The morning of Parade Night dawned watery and gray with a hint of chill already in the air. Revelers lined up early, their spirits not the slightest bit dampened. Each vied for the best spots along the parade route. Strolling bards and merchants, food carts and beer wagons all did their best to separate the crowd from their coins. The urchins of the Proudfoot home did much the same, although with less fanfare and merriment.
The revelers all dressed for the festivities. Some wore feast-day best, while others wore colorful costumes as imaginative as the performers. Not to be outdone by Mage Lords, all the peoples of the city organized their own crewes and paraded through the streets with floats, musicians, and jugglers. While none of them would dare to claim that they were trying to outdo the Riverfolk, for whom this was a solemn and important part of their social calendar, the Human, Half-Elf, Mountainfolk, and Hillfolk all rattled their sabers at one another, with each faction trying as hard as the could to win the favor of the crowd. It was a display of wealth and power, and while there would be no official winner, they would spend the next three frozen months discussing little else than today’s events.
The Sun finally appeared late in the afternoon, as though casting one last look upon her Riverfolk children, and set red and sudden behind the western hill. It was the signal for the real parade to begin.
On the rooftops high above the city, it was the signal for another figure to begin a journey of his own.
He too was dressed for the occasion, in a tunic and cloak in shades of gray and blue so dark they were almost black. He carried a bulging sack that seemed too large for his Hillfolk frame but managed it as though it weighed nothing at all. In deference to the occasion, he wore a crown of black velvet antlers.
The figure moved silently from roof to roof, making his way from Dockside to Small-Town. He dodged rain barrels and hid behind chimneys as the occasional mage-summoned firework lit the darkening sky in garish flames. A few enterprising citizens with flat roofs camped above, but these he mostly avoided, and if they noticed him, they made no sign. Some things that were cause for alarm were perfectly reasonable on Parade Night.
It was barely full dark when Bingo found himself at the edge of Small-Town. He stood on the roof of a gray factory building, staring across the alley that separated it from the Proudfoot Home for Wayward Hillfolk Youth. Save for a single candle, the building was dark. That would be Mr. Simmons, the old night watchman. Bingo remembered him, and if nothing had changed, he would not be much of an obstacle. The townhouses on either side were dark. They’d been bought up and hollowed out by the family years ago, and were a collection of fronts, dead drops, and safehouses, littered with secret entrances and hidden tunnels. He watched them for a long time, but tonight nobody went in or out.
Bingo reached into a hidden pocket and pulled out a fledge. He twisted the legs flat and flicked a switch on the beak, opening it to reveal a hidden lens. He raised it to his eye like a spyglass and examined the rooftop, finding the best spot. He collapsed the fledge down again, making a few twists here and releasing a hidden catch there to reveal a grapnel and a coil of black silk cord. He hooked the roof on the first try, and a simple three-story tightrope walk later, he was standing on the roof of his childhood home. He spotted all the familiar hazards. Its shadowed tripwires and trapped flagstones were all right where he remembered them. He collapsed his fledge again and made his careful way across the stones. He ignored the false access door and instead made his way to an attic window. He flicked a tail feather and the fledge’s gem eyes projected a beam of soft, blue light. Producing the other fledge, he twisted a talon into a skeleton key. Under the faint illumination, he found the secret lock. It looked good, but Miss Rosemary had had plenty of time to upgrade things. He unlocked the door with a faint click, and the window swung outward on well-oiled hinges. He was glad to see he wasn’t the only orphan who’d found this passage out. Bingo slipped inside, reminding himself that while his actions were technically breaking and entering, they weren’t burglary. Just the opposite, in fact.
He began with the top floor, the boys’ dormitory. The older boys were all still out, pinching wallets and fawning rings. Only the youngest were abed, and all of them were asleep. Quickly and quietly, he went about his work, leaving packages at the foot of each bed filled with candy and toys, along with warm winter clothes. Glory’s work was beyond reproach. Not only was the sack nearly as light as air, it always gave him exactly what he wanted every time he opened it.
He moved to the stairs, carefully avoiding the ones that creaked and the third from the top, which was rigged to break. He didn’t touch the handrail at all. He snuck past the snoring watchman, who was strategically positioned on the 2nd story landing between the girls’ and boys’ dorms. He looked as old and weather-beaten as he remembered. Bingo found a scarf and a bottle of something for him in the sack. He’d ruined a number of schemes in Bingo’s boyhood, but he’d always looked out for him.
The girls’ dorm was forbidden territory from his youth, but the layout was just the same. He distributed the rest of the gifts and moved on as quickly as he dared, the residual dread of being caught here of all places still hiding in his memories like fog in a valley. He made his way back to the stairs, and down to the ground floor.
He hung went straight to work in the massive dining hall, hanging streamers and tinsel. He covered the long tables with a feast, piling so many cakes and jugs of cider that he was afraid the ancient wood would collapse. He moved to the pantries and loaded them with a whole season’s worth of sausages, preserved fruit, and other goodies.
He looked into his sack and found only one gift left.
The door to the Headmistress’s Office was stoutly locked and definitely trapped. It was the one room in the building that Bingo had never managed to break into as a child. Even now, it made him a little nervous. He brought out the fledges and got to work. True to form, Rosemary had no less than a dozen sensors, a sophisticated alarm mechanism he was mostly sure he disabled, and a hidden needle coated with itching poison. It wasn’t fatal, but you’d wish it was. But after a few minutes of work, Bingo was satisfied to hear nothing as the silent hinges swung inward. He pulled out a bouquet of hothouse-grown white roses, Miss Rosemary’s favorites. He left them, along with a note, on the perfectly neat desk, and paused. Doubtless, that desk was full of secrets. It might even have a clue to his birth parents. He’d left on such rotten terms with her, he’d never gotten a chance to see his file. She’d reminded him of that fact when he left. He bet she still had it in that big antique desk of hers.
But just as he moved towards the top drawer, he had a feeling like a gong sounding between his ears. Glory sent her signal. Rosemary and her urchins were on their way back, and there would be hell to pay if he was still here when they arrived. He didn’t take the time to reset the office door, but made his way quickly back up the way he had come and out through the attic.
From his perch on the roof across the alley, he watched them return, a tide of hill children in grubby black cloaks, led by Miss Rosemary, thumping her cane with every step. She looked older than he remembered. She fished into her coat for the big front door key, and they all shuffled silently inside like a line of ghosts.
When they reached the dining hall, the building erupted in light and noise. Bingo watched through the fledge in spyglass mode. Children ran everywhere shouting, laughing, and screaming. Some tried to purloin all the gifts before anyone else could. Others tried to take what they could from the other children. Some tried to cram as much food as they could into their faces before someone stopped them. It was a hurricane, with Miss Rosemary standing ancient and imperious in the center, with her great black hat and hickory stick. Bingo thought she leaned a bit more heavily on it than he remembered, and her face looked a bit more careworn.
She picked out a few of the older boys and girls to break up the fights and get everything organized. It was an efficient system, although it relied on more delegation than he remembered in his day. They got the children seated and started passing out plates and cups. A few of the older kids gathered up the scattered packages and redistributed them, making sure nobody was left out.
Miss Rosemary did an inspection of the rooms on the first floor, and Bingo had to admit to feeling a thrill as she stood red-faced and stunned before her open office door. She practically stomped to her desk. She raised her arms as though she were about to knock the roses in the trash, but instead, she sat down defeated in her chair and plucked up the card.
Bingo watched her expression go from rage to bemusement and finally to settle into a smile that seemed a little sad. She brought the roses to her nose and sniffed them before cutting a single blossom free and fixing it to her blouse. She stood with some difficulty and rejoined her charges.
The children were eating together, laughing and comparing new hats and gloves, or playing with their new toys in the candlelight. If it weren’t for the uniforms, they could be normal children on Parade Night.
Bingo watched for a while, tempted to rush down, and knowing it was a terrible idea. Those children didn’t need to see him. He’d done this deed to get clear of the debt, but he found himself feeling inexplicably light.
He’d spent a long time running from his past, but it had come for him anyway. But as much as he’d hated that place, he felt something akin to affection, to freedom. He wasn’t running anymore. Bingo blinked away a few tears and set the fledges back in his cloak. Their weight felt comfortable at last.
There was a brilliant mage-work flash of light above, and bells started tolling midnight across the city. The parade was over, and the Riverfolk were sealing the lake behind them in a thick layer of ice. As the last chime faded, a snowflake drifted down and landed on Bingo’s gloved hand.
He watched it melt as he made his way down to the street. Somewhere, his friends were waiting for him. It was a new year, and the night was young. He would make the most of both.

The Freelance Hunters, Season One: The Unknown Package, Part 4 of 5

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The two Proudfoots took a table in a corner of the store’s backroom. They watched a small army of clerks unload cart after cart that arrived and departed like clockwork.
“We’re in the last of our Parade Night rush,” Big Jim explained.
“I’m chuffed to see you still doing well,” Bingo said. He sipped tea from a chipped brown mug. It was as sweet and strong as he remembered.
Big Jim took out a pipe and lit it with a match. He offered his bag to Bingo, who declined. It was one of many habits he’d never picked up. “It seems like every merchant and farmer on the island wants to get one last shipment in before the city freezes. And where do they think I’ll store it, I ask you. Am I a mage? My sons will have my hide if they catch me smoking back here, so let’s keep this between us,” he said conspiratorially. “Now, why don’t you show me one of those presents everyone has been whispering about?”
Bingo hesitated before reaching into his coat and producing a fledge. It seemed a small thing, resting on the chipped tabletop. But was probably worth more than most of the goods in the stockroom put together. Jim whistled around his pipe appreciatively, but made no move to take the object. “That’s the genuine article, alright. Why don’t you put it away before someone sees?” Bingo gave him an appraising look as he disappeared the object into a hidden pocket.
“And what makes you so sure, Mr. Proudfoot? I always thought you were a legitimate businessman. Can you spot such elicit goods with a glance?”
“First of all, call me Jim. You’re well past your coming of age. And I know because there has been little talk of anything else around town. You’d know that if you stuck closer to the ground.”
“I’ve been out of town.”
“On assignment for that Bywater witch?” Bingo grimaced.
“I don’t work for Glory. We’re a part of a team.”
“Are you sure about that? Mages are crafty, and women, well they can be worse. Especially for a man of your age. I’d hate to see you get out from one woman’s thumb to only be led around by another.”
“It’s not like that. We work together, is all. She’s useful.”
“My mistake. I assumed you had an interest, but maybe I shouldn’t have. You were awfully close with… what was the lad’s name?” Bingo slammed his mug on the tabletop, harder than he’d meant to, but he kept the steel in his grimace as he stared down the old man.
“That was a long time ago, and I got out.”
“So you say, so you say,” Big Jim made a placating gesture. “But now Madame Rosemary’s found a way to stir it all up again. And with not just one fledge, but two? She’s got you over a barrel, no mistake.”
“Your ear for gossip is better than I’d expect. A re you on The Five?” Bingo asked almost before he could stop himself. Unlike traditional Hillfolk clans, the exact membership of the council of elders was kept strictly secret, for safety.
Big Jim gave him a wicked grin from behind his pipe. “I hear things, is all. But never mind about me. What are you going to get Miss Rosemary in return?”
“That isn’t possible.”
“The adventuring business can’t be as bad as all that, can it?”
“She didn’t commission those expecting an exchange. She means to shackle me with them.”
“Well, surely a clever boy like you can find a way out of a snare as simple as that.”
“There’s nothing I can give her that would come close to clearing that balance. The whole town’s already in an uproar! I may have to bend the knee to her just to save my skin.”
Big Jim chuckled. “And here I thought you the boy that bought himself out of clan debt when nobody else could. A gift isn’t the wrapping it comes in. It isn’t something that you buy, it’s something you feel.”
“What do you mean?”
“If this is a trap, outthink her. You can’t give Rosemary Proudfoot what she expects. So you’ll have to give her something she doesn’t know she wants.”
Bingo took a deep breath. He’d been running since he’d unwrapped the fledges. He’d been trying to protect himself. Jim was right. He needed to slow down and take stock of his situation. But this was a new depth for him. He’d been trained as a thief. Giving wasn’t a part of his nature. As he looked around, all he saw was the trimmings. The tinsel and the stockings and the oranges. The parts of the feast that he’d dreamed about when he was eating gruel and listening to fireworks, the bonfires he’d longed for while he was huddled in bed, pretending to sleep as the chill of winter fell over the city.
And suddenly, all at once, he found the answer. It would be expensive, and it would be dangerous, but he’d managed to sneak out of the Proudfoot home when he was still in training. It was considered a right of passage. Surely breaking in couldn’t be that hard. He grinned.
“Jim, I think I have something, but it’ll be a big order.”
It was nearly sunset whenBingo returned home. He had a stack of packages under his arms and a phalanx of delivery boys and girls trailing in his wake. After making a brief stop to settle accounts with Mr. Gannet, and to give him a little something for his trouble, Bingo marched upstairs and oversaw the stacking of boxes in the sitting room.
Joachim and Glory sat by the hearth. The warrior was darning his chainmail while the mage frowned over a thick tome. They paused to watch the proceedings with interest. When the last crate was delivered, making a pile that nearly reached the rafters, Bingo gave each of his helpers a copper rat and sent them on their way.
“Rent’s sorted,” he said by way of greeting, and tossed each fo them a jingling bag.
“We ate, but there’s some soup and bread left if you’re hungry,” Joachim said, and went back to his work. Glory eyed the pile of goods with an arched eyebrow.
“What is all this?” She asked.
“Oh, just a few odds and ends. For Parade Night, you understand.”
Glory set down her book and examined the stack. “Candied oranges, tinsel, holly, an entire storefront window of toys, and that a ham? What did all this cost you?”
“Most of my share. I’ll be eating light until spring, but it won’t be a problem.”
“Why the sudden change of heart?” Joachim asked.
“I’ve been thinking about my predicament, and I’ve come up with a solution. It’s not just a way to get clear, but maybe do some good for once, too. You remember that I said I never had a proper Parade Night celebration?”
“Yes.”
“Well, the kiddies at the orphanage are going to get the Parade Night of their lives this year!”
“From what you told me of your mentor,” Glory said, digging into a box of sugar biscuits. “She will hardly stand for this act of generosity.”
“Those aren’t for you,” Bingo snatched the tin away from her. “But you’re bang on. I guess I’ll have to sneak in. If only I had a set of top of the line burglary tools, eh?”
“Well, it sound like you’ve got it all figured out,” Glory said.
“There is one thing,” he asked.
“Looking for helpers?”
“I’ll handle the distribution, but I’m going to need away to carry it. You wouldn’t be able to magic me up a bottomless sack to carry all this loot, would you?”
“If you only need it for a day, it shouldn’t be a problem. I’d be happy to help.”
“Butter on bacon! Joachim, I do have a spot for you in this little heist too.”
“Oh?”
“Grab a good spot on the Bridge of Blessings and start celebrating early.”
The big human smirked. “I suppose.”
“Don’t get too pickled. I’ll need you to keep a lookout. Can you and Glory send me a signal when the urchins are on their way back?” The pair nodded.
“Magic. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to get this feast in the oven in time for tomorrow’s festivities!” Bingo set to work, looking happier than his companions could ever remember seeing him.

The Freelance Hunters Season One: The Unknown Package Part 2 of 5

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“A trap?” Glory asked, and stripped off her elbow-length gloves, revealing the angular, rune-like tattoos that stretched from her forearms to her fingertips. They were scribed in metallic ink favored by the Riverfolk and she used them to shape her spells. “If that’s a trap, let me eliminate it.” She began gesturing at the brown paper package. Bingo set a hand on her arm.
“Magic might set it off. Best to let me do it the old-fashioned way. But if you could start a fire, I’d be grateful.”
He pulled up a stool and selected a lens from the kit and put it to his eye. “Joachim, would you get the curtains? I could use more light.” He did nothing but look closely at the package for several minutes, never touching it save to slowly and carefully turn it to better examine the opposite side. Finally, he stretched and scratched thoughtfully at his short brown goatee. “Well, there’s no obvious traps, but it’s most likely to go off when I open the damn thing.”
“Perhaps she’s trying to make amends,” Glory offered.
“Are all Spark-fingers as soft as you, Glory?”
“It is the holidays, you cynic.”
Bingo sighed. “The Proudfoot orphanage is a system. Some kids get adopted from it, but most of us, we just a pool of laborers. And as much as they call it a charity, you go through those doors, you owe a debt. Someone buys your debt, you’re their’s to adopt, and very few questions are asked.” Glory gasped.
“Some isn’t none, Glory. Rosemary had her line. Nothing too dirty, no kids ended up in the brothels or begging in the gutters. She never did nothing that would raise the Mage Lords’ hackles. But lots of kids got adopted into manual labor, and they were the lucky ones. I got apprenticed into the clan itself. They taught me to pick pockets, break locks, that sort of thing. It might not seem like a lot, but the clan invested a lot in training me. You can pay off a debt, but Madam Rosemary never got over losing her investment in me. So no, I don’t think it’s a box of cookies.”
“Why not just toss it away,” Joachim asked.
“That is such a Tallfolk thing to ask. It’s a gift. Handed off by Maile Man, so there’s a paper trail. Gifts are a big deal among our people, Joachim.” Bingo selected a fine scalpel from the kit and made a careful, slow slash down the front two corners of the package, then a third along the top. A flap of paper fell outward, revealing a layer of tightly packed straw inside. Bingo repeated the motion on the other sides, then gently lifted up the stamped paper.
He set the scalpel down and took a small brush from the kit. With controlled motions, he brushed the straw away, revealing a plywood crate about a foot square. Returning to the lens, he spent a few more minutes examining it from all angles. Finally, he selected a small screwdriver and undid the screws in each corner of the lid, setting each one carefully aside.
“Well, time to see what all this fuss is about.” He gently lifted the lid and looked inside. An extended silence followed.
“What is it?” Joachim asked. “A trap after all?”
“Worse,” Bingo said. He reached in and pulled out a metal bird slightly larger than his palm. It had a long, needle-pointed beak, and large, hooked feet. A spray of tail feathers sprang from a smooth, oval body made of brass and steel. “She sent me a pair of fledges.” Bingo looked like he was fighting tears.
Glory gasped. Joachim looked from one companion to the other, perplexed.
“I’ve heard of them,” Gory said. “They are a sort of magical all-purpose tool carried by high ranking Thieves’ Guilders. And she sent you two?”
Bingo set the device carefully on the table and backed towards a couch. He collapsed onto it with his head in his hands. “She doesn’t want revenge. She just wants me back under her thumb!”
“There’s a note,” Glory said, and reached into the box. The stationary was delicate but stiff, and the watermark in the corner was a pink rose. Despite the ladylike card, the writing was as clear and no-nonsense as the address. Glory cleared her throat and read the card aloud.
“My Dear Bingoran,
I hope this package finds you in good health. Although it has been some years since we have last spoken, your matron thinks of you often. As do, I am quite certain, your childhood friends from your days here at the orphanage. Please enjoy these Fledges, which I have commissioned on your behalf. I worry about you being all alone in the world since you left. Come visit your old Matron sometime and let her know how you are faring.
Sincerest Regards,
Ms. Rosemary Proudfoot.
“Bingoran? Really?”
“Shut up,” Bingo snapped.
“Sweet of the old lady,” Joachim offered.
“Sweet nothing. It’s a trap after all,” Bingo said, composing himself.
“What am I missing?” The fighter asked.
“It’s like this,” Glory explained. “For Hillfolk, gifts have a high social significance. And this is a princely one. It’s not merely expensive there’s status implications. It has a lot of invisible strings attached.
“So, why doesn’t he just refuse it?”
“Refusing a gift such as this one would be an insult. And you do not insult the Proudfoot Clan if you enjoy breathing.”
“So get her some flowers and write a nice thank-you note.”
“Bingo,” Glory asked. “What would you estimate is the value of that emerald we returned with?”
“After cutting, it should bring in, I don’t know, eight hundred gold krakens. Enough to pay our rent and give each of us enough to live on until spring.”
“And how much would you say one of those fledges is worth?”
“You don’t just run down to the corner and buy one, but probably, oh, ten thousand krakens, easily.”
“So a thank-you note isn’t going to cut it, and if he refuses them, we’re, what? Swarmed by three-foot tall assassins?”
“Precisely.”
“So what do we do?”
“We aren’t doing anything. This is my trouble, and I won’t have you two mixed up in it.”
Joachim shook his head. “We’re a team. We stand by you.” Glory voiced her agreement.
Bingo stood, his expression unreadable. “I’m going to bed. Tomorrow I’ll fence the stone and take care of the rent. After that? I’m not sure yet.”
“Where did you hide that emerald, by the way?” Glory asked. “The guards searched that searched at the gate was thorough in his work.”
“Nowhere comfortable,” Bingo said, and disappeared into his room, taking his presents with him.

Everyday Drabbles #1042: The Family Cookie Recipes

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The recipe cards for the family Christmas cookies had been passed down through the generations on yellowing index cards. They were one of his most treasured possessions.
He loved baking not just because it gave him a connection to his lost family and his own treasured memories, but because it was a skill he pass down to his own children, who eagerly volunteered to help.
When his eight-year-old daughter ruined the cards by spilling juice on them, he was devastated.
But he found a greater connection and joy remaking them from wit and memory than he’d ever had following directions.

The Mountain’s Shadow is now available from Amazon and Smashwords!

Everyday Drabbles #1041: The Drifter in Red

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The stranger wandered into the saloon on a snowy evening, looking no different from all the other passing drifters. Except his hat and duster were red and lined with white fur.He sat down at the poker table and put up his stake. He was friendly and garrulous, and after a few hands, things started to go his way.At midnight he rose fro his seat, tipped his hat, and disappeared into the night. The other players followed him outside and found only a few lumps of coal waiting where he’d stood.That’s when they remembered it was Christmas Eve.

The Mountain’s Shadow is now available from Amazon and Smashwords!

Podcast Repost: CCRC80 – A Charlie Brown Christmas

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Tonight join your hosts, Hugh, Rich the Time Traveller, Opop, and Jurd, as they Snoopy dance.

[CCR Feed: RSS/iTunes | Skinner Co.: RSS/iTunes]

Chrononaut Cinema Reviews is presented by https://www.skinner.fm and http://hughjodonnell.com, and is released under the Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial 3.0 Unported License.

Everyday Drabbles #621: The Evergreen

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The tree stood in a corner of the little churchyard, a resilient and determined evergreen.
The city had grown up around the church, and after the old neighborhood had been demolished to build skyscrapers, nobody came to mass these days. The land the little old church sat on was valuable, and the city had grander houses of worship. It was only a matter of time.
The tree didn’t know any of this. But it was steady and had good roots. The priest strung it with lights for what would probably be the last time and thanked his most faithful parishioner.

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